I Am Who I Am: Navigating Identity, Faith, and Family as a Gay Man in Indonesia

This qualitative study explores the formation of sexual identity, internal–external conflicts, and the self-acceptance process of a homosexual man within the Indonesian socio-cultural context shaped by religious and heteronormative values. Using an intrinsic case study approach, data were collected through in-depth interviews with a 28-year-old male participant who had undergone the coming out process and were analyzed thematically. Findings reveal the ambivalent role of family dynamics: the mother’s emotional support functioned as a protective factor, whereas the father’s rigid religious stance intensified internal conflict. The participant experienced early identity confusion compounded by stigma, discrimination, and religious pressure, contributing to minority stress and suicide attempts. Self-acceptance developed through selective coming out, social support, and romantic relationships, culminating in an ego-syntonic state characterized by integration of sexual identity, spirituality, and future aspirations. The study underscores the complexity of homosexual identity development in Indonesia, emphasizing the central influence of family and religion. It highlights the need for inclusive family support, culturally sensitive psychosocial interventions, and safe spaces to promote healthy self-acceptance among individuals with minority sexual orientations.